No infection

They have officially said that Jo Jo does not have an infection. They have stopped her antibiotics and taken her off of isolation. She is doing very well with her feeds, I hope that we can start practicing with her bottle soon. I am looking forward to working with the speech therapist to get her started again with bottle feeds. She has been having peaceful evenings with no problems. Her core temperature gets warm every now and again but all they do is uncover her for a little while and she goes back to normal. They started her on calcium supplements today. She always does really well when she gets her calcium drip so I think that they are going to start incorporating it into an everyday routine for her to have a calcium supplement. They are talking again about moving her out of the cardiac ICU and up to the cardiac floor. We will see how she does over the next few days. Hopefully we can be out of the ICU for Christmas. I am having a really hard time getting into the holiday spirit. Usually Christmas is my favorite time of year. I love to decorate the house and do fun things with the kids. I just can't seem to get my house decorated. I have had my decorations out for almost a week and still not much going on yet. I know that I need to get it together for the boys, I just feel really sad that Jo Jo isn't home. Every time I think about her spending her first Christmas in the hospital I get a sick feeling in my stomach and I just want to cry. I am trying so hard just to keep myself going for day to day activities that life requires, I am struggling with the extra that I usually have no trouble coming up with for Christmas festivities. It's almost like I feel guilty for having a good time while Jolianne is in the hospital. I know in my heart that Jo Jo would want me to be happy for Christmas and I am going to try very hard to get it together. My kiddos deserve to have Christmas Mommy, I just have to reach in a little deeper this year to bring her to the surface.